I feel so unattached to the outside world sometimes. It can be a little overwhelming too sometimes. I sometimes think maybe I need more connections, but then in my very next breath, I think, ugh, that gives me major anxiety and I don't like it. Notice I keep saying sometimes, well because it IS just sometimes. I wouldn't change staying home with Maggie for ANYTHING. I don't think Aj and I have any couple friends with at least one kid Maggie's age that we'd just hang out with...when we do have time...we spend time together...at home...quality time with the 3 of us is so important...then I read blogs or facebook statuses (statusi?) of people 'doing' cool stuff. Is it because their kids are older or they have friends? I have a wonderful family, but we're all right here together, so there is no traveling to see them (which sometimes, again sometimes, sounds like it would be fun), there are no lake houses to visit, no big reunions...plus hello, all that cwap costs money too....soooooooo...
Most days though, it's so awesome being close to my family, I can't believe how blessed I am...I get to BE a part of everything that happens with my Nieces and Nephews and Sister and Mom and Granny and Dad and StepKlen...and my friends are right here too...I don't see enough of them...but they are right here and that is comforting...if I made that call, any one of them could be on my porch in about 20 minutes or less...
So what's my deal?
Tomorrow is a holiday. Every day is the same for me now that I don't work, weekends are just more days in the week. Aj's days off are revolving so those tend to be my weekends now for the most part, but I never really feel that oh it's friday, thank god for the weekend feeling I used to get when I had a 'job'. Maybe that is the problem, I need to plan more fun things that don't cost much for us to do on Aj's days off. I need to change it up some, like little things Maggie and I can do differently like once a week. It's nice that Jenna and Will are available too this summer for swimming and the kids playing together, but oh god, Will will be in school. Then Maggie has no "KID" to pal around with.
I'm worrying too much and I shouldn't be. This is easy to fix.
This week, after Memorial Day Parade and a cook out...we get sand for the sand box, we get dirty, we go to the beach, we decorate the driveway with sidewalk chalk art, we go swim, and we NAP hard. :) LOL
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Thursday, May 27, 2010
da Waduh
I woke up to Maggie saying go in da waduh...
Jenna got a small pool and we all went 'swimming' yesterday, more like moving around on our knees and the kids jumping all over the place...
Wait wait wait, let's back up.
First we had to find her suit, go to Target for Little Swimmers, get new HOLLYWOODS (aka sunglasses), pink sandals and some dive toys...thank you dollar spot...we love things for a dollar...anywho, Maggie told me before we left, she wanted to 'go shopping at da target'...so instead of going to Walmart, we went to Target, she was so good and happy there. She thought AntGin and Will would be there too and seemed confused that they weren't, but dollar spot made her get over that confusion pretty quickly. She really only reaches for or 'asks' for a few things usually too, this is a girl that knows what she wants...I let her pick between 3 Hollywoods, yellow little flower ones, pink 'adulty' ones and red heart ones. It wasn't even a real decision, she looked at me like duh mom um the pink ones and grabbed them. They are so cute too, they are pretty adult looking, which is so funny. She wore them for about an hour before she thought it wasn't bright enough in the house to keep wearing them. Ha. Sandal trying on was funny. I put on flip flop like sandals, where there was a strap BETWEEN her toes, she said instantly 'not ready mommy no'. Her toes were moving so fast to get that damn strap out from BETWEEN her tootbugs. Ok how about these, they would be so cute with little flowers on them, all different colors, 'no mommy pick one'...so i let her pick. She pointed to the pink 2 strapped ones that had nothing BETWEEN her toots...not my 1st choice, but she LOVED them. She wore them last night after her bath with her jammies! :) The Little Swimmers diapers rocked because they had Nemo and Doe-y on them...yeah, plus they really did work great in the pool. No soggy 10 lbs of wet butt draggin between her legs, which is nice.
Anywho, after lunch we went in da 'waduh'. FINALLY. Mommy waduh Mommy waduh Mommy waduh...hold it child, I'm stuffin my face with pizza, just give me one second please...mommy waduh mommy waduh...
We got in the waduh. She loved it. Natural fish, must get that from Moto Moto, cuz me and water not so much...Jenna's pool is great, it's 2 1/2 feet deep, no yucky lake bottom, so I was in heaven. Ha. Maggie jumped and jumped and jumped...Will dove under a gazillion times...we made a whirlpool...crashed into each other...went 'backerds'...'funs mommy'...Maggie was basically doing some sort of water synchronized dance and singing too...hilarious...back and forth singing and dancing for like a half hour straight pretty much...she only did this because we let her out of the little floaty. Freedom = Performance :)
Jenna got a small pool and we all went 'swimming' yesterday, more like moving around on our knees and the kids jumping all over the place...
Wait wait wait, let's back up.
First we had to find her suit, go to Target for Little Swimmers, get new HOLLYWOODS (aka sunglasses), pink sandals and some dive toys...thank you dollar spot...we love things for a dollar...anywho, Maggie told me before we left, she wanted to 'go shopping at da target'...so instead of going to Walmart, we went to Target, she was so good and happy there. She thought AntGin and Will would be there too and seemed confused that they weren't, but dollar spot made her get over that confusion pretty quickly. She really only reaches for or 'asks' for a few things usually too, this is a girl that knows what she wants...I let her pick between 3 Hollywoods, yellow little flower ones, pink 'adulty' ones and red heart ones. It wasn't even a real decision, she looked at me like duh mom um the pink ones and grabbed them. They are so cute too, they are pretty adult looking, which is so funny. She wore them for about an hour before she thought it wasn't bright enough in the house to keep wearing them. Ha. Sandal trying on was funny. I put on flip flop like sandals, where there was a strap BETWEEN her toes, she said instantly 'not ready mommy no'. Her toes were moving so fast to get that damn strap out from BETWEEN her tootbugs. Ok how about these, they would be so cute with little flowers on them, all different colors, 'no mommy pick one'...so i let her pick. She pointed to the pink 2 strapped ones that had nothing BETWEEN her toots...not my 1st choice, but she LOVED them. She wore them last night after her bath with her jammies! :) The Little Swimmers diapers rocked because they had Nemo and Doe-y on them...yeah, plus they really did work great in the pool. No soggy 10 lbs of wet butt draggin between her legs, which is nice.
Anywho, after lunch we went in da 'waduh'. FINALLY. Mommy waduh Mommy waduh Mommy waduh...hold it child, I'm stuffin my face with pizza, just give me one second please...mommy waduh mommy waduh...
We got in the waduh. She loved it. Natural fish, must get that from Moto Moto, cuz me and water not so much...Jenna's pool is great, it's 2 1/2 feet deep, no yucky lake bottom, so I was in heaven. Ha. Maggie jumped and jumped and jumped...Will dove under a gazillion times...we made a whirlpool...crashed into each other...went 'backerds'...'funs mommy'...Maggie was basically doing some sort of water synchronized dance and singing too...hilarious...back and forth singing and dancing for like a half hour straight pretty much...she only did this because we let her out of the little floaty. Freedom = Performance :)
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Humid
•wetness in the atmosphere
•Humidity is the amount of water vapor in the air. Relative humidity is defined as the ratio of the partial pressure of water vapor in a parcel of air to the saturated vapor pressure of water vapor at a prescribed temperature. Humidity may also be expressed as specific humidity
•humid - Containing sensible moisture (usually describing air or atmosphere); damp; moist; somewhat wet or watery; as, humid earth; consisting of water or vapor
•The moisture content of air
•Moisture or dampness. Complete saturation would be considered 100 percent humidity.
I thought maybe looking up the word humidity would make me hate it less...didn't work. I think we'll be enemies FOREVER.
•Humidity is the amount of water vapor in the air. Relative humidity is defined as the ratio of the partial pressure of water vapor in a parcel of air to the saturated vapor pressure of water vapor at a prescribed temperature. Humidity may also be expressed as specific humidity
•humid - Containing sensible moisture (usually describing air or atmosphere); damp; moist; somewhat wet or watery; as, humid earth; consisting of water or vapor
•The moisture content of air
•Moisture or dampness. Complete saturation would be considered 100 percent humidity.
I thought maybe looking up the word humidity would make me hate it less...didn't work. I think we'll be enemies FOREVER.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Road Trip (2)
We left the trailor park in Mishawaka on March 4, 2001...
Drove thru Springfield, Illinois(Springfield Springfield it's a helluvah town...this would the annoying start to me 'singing' songs with the names of the towns or cities we drove thru). First cool site was The Arch in St. Louis, Missouri. It was just past dusk and getting pretty dark and it was closed, but we saw The Arch. It was WAY bigger than I'd ever thought it would be even after seeing it in pictures. Pictures don't do the real thing any justice.
Off to Oklahoma...been up 24 hours...It was a beautiful sunny morning when we got to Oklahoma...Song: OOOOOOklahoma where the wind comes sweeping down the plain...They have the coolest state sign in all of the U.S. that we saw. Sounds so not important, but we stopped to take a picture by it. It was a big concrete sign with landscaping around it. Jenna likes it so much, she left a momento there...should I say what she left? Hell, who cares now, she left her underwear by the sign. We laughed so hard. We were thinking ok, we're OUT WEST, we'll see cowboys and windmills at least right?! Um, best cowboys we saw were on the post card I bought and the cover of my Tim McGraw CD's. The best windmill we saw was really tall but was missing most of it's paddles, what a let down. Ha. But we still took a picture of it. Had to. Oklahoma also had weird road signs. The one we thought was like WHAT? was Do Not Drive Into Smoke. We are Hoosiers, we don't know what that means, but we never saw any smoke to not drive into, so we're good. My personal fave was Hitchhikers May Be Escaped Inmates. Excuse me, but isn't it a time in the world where you just don't pick up ANY hitchhikers, just sayin! Man this is a close 2nd fave because it seems so obvious but it said Don't Drive On The Median. What? Route 66 is in Oklahoma? Route 66 museum, hell yes. We even drove 23 miles to see a big stupid blue whale. A fake one, not a real one if you are confused. Ha Ha Ha. Just so you know if you ever drive on Route 66, it's very scenic, a little lame and it literally dead ends in the middle of nowhere. Literally nowhere. We had to get off it a little before it just ended at a gas station and figure out what road to then take to keep um driving west. Kinda funny really. Route 66 just dead ends.
So. We found some road to drive on to Texas...All my Ex's live in Texas, The size of TX deep inside,Amarillo by Mornin...do you know how many songs have Texas in them? alot, trust me. We drove thru Amarillo. You'd think the picture songs paint of Amarillo that it'd be cool. Amarillo was scary. It was One Huge Cheesy Hilly to da Billy Dump of a place. For real. Dump.
In case you are wondering, we haven't slept yet. We did stop to take a PTA at least once by now though, so we don't stink:) If you are unsure of what a PTA is, think long and hard about it, you'll figure it out.
Yeah, we found a really nice windmill with all it's paddles too. Looked like a picture out of an old west movie, really cool. Jenna was super excited. Jenna, do you see that? Yes. What is it? I don't know, let's go see. It's the Biggest Cross in the United States. We had to take picutures, of course, we knew Granny would have loved to see it.
We didn't actually STOP and sleep and stay in a hotel until Gallop, New Mexico. Why? Not sure. I think we were just having too much fun feeling the freedom of having no where to go.
We'd stop when we wanted to 'see' something or have to pee or eat (again) or fill up with more gas...little honda prelude was pretty good on gas thank goodness...it never felt cramped in that car either, which is weird, cuz it's small...felt cramped after the WHOLE TRIP was actually OVER, but that would be like 3weeks from now...anywho....it's only March 6th now and we're in New Mexico...
Gallup, New Mexico was so pretty. At night we saw all the little adobe Pueblo Indian Reservation 'homes' lit up on the side of the 'mountains'. Super cool. Jenna finally was driving when we hit New Mexico...she was so tired at one point, she yelled "Kendra I need your help, my eyeballs are like stuck!". We still laugh about this. We slept forever in that hotel too, finally got up to leave and we were eating pizza for 'breakfast' at 2:00pm. What is it about this trip that I crave pizza? ha ha ha I swear every time we needed food, we both wanted pizza. Some gas stations had the best pizza and Pizza Hut is everywhere. oh almost forgot my song...just so happens to be Tim...Albuquerque...waitin outta blizzard. We just drove through the ginormous city of Albuquerque in the middle of the night towards Gallup. It seemed to be a nice city if I remember right, but really all I remember was it was like HUGE and Glowing with lights. Before this trip, I didn't know how to spell Albuquerque either, now I do.
Anywho(I say anywho alot forgive me)I wanted to at least see ONE cactus, you know, like a perfect guy with a hat on cactus...not even one in all of the Painted Desert. Ok, I'm sure there's at least one, but not from where we could see from the road and any of our stops. New Mexico is FLAT. Pretty, but flat...with big rock figures out in the distance. Don't wanna call them mountains, cuz they were way smaller than any mountains. I think it was about this point in our trip that we said, ok we can't just drive until we wanna die of sleep, we have to sleep AT NIGHT and drive during the DAY. Ha. I find it funny how we had to have an actual talk about this, like it never even crossed our minds before this...Arizona, here was come, after we sleep.
(...to be cont...)
Drove thru Springfield, Illinois(Springfield Springfield it's a helluvah town...this would the annoying start to me 'singing' songs with the names of the towns or cities we drove thru). First cool site was The Arch in St. Louis, Missouri. It was just past dusk and getting pretty dark and it was closed, but we saw The Arch. It was WAY bigger than I'd ever thought it would be even after seeing it in pictures. Pictures don't do the real thing any justice.
Off to Oklahoma...been up 24 hours...It was a beautiful sunny morning when we got to Oklahoma...Song: OOOOOOklahoma where the wind comes sweeping down the plain...They have the coolest state sign in all of the U.S. that we saw. Sounds so not important, but we stopped to take a picture by it. It was a big concrete sign with landscaping around it. Jenna likes it so much, she left a momento there...should I say what she left? Hell, who cares now, she left her underwear by the sign. We laughed so hard. We were thinking ok, we're OUT WEST, we'll see cowboys and windmills at least right?! Um, best cowboys we saw were on the post card I bought and the cover of my Tim McGraw CD's. The best windmill we saw was really tall but was missing most of it's paddles, what a let down. Ha. But we still took a picture of it. Had to. Oklahoma also had weird road signs. The one we thought was like WHAT? was Do Not Drive Into Smoke. We are Hoosiers, we don't know what that means, but we never saw any smoke to not drive into, so we're good. My personal fave was Hitchhikers May Be Escaped Inmates. Excuse me, but isn't it a time in the world where you just don't pick up ANY hitchhikers, just sayin! Man this is a close 2nd fave because it seems so obvious but it said Don't Drive On The Median. What? Route 66 is in Oklahoma? Route 66 museum, hell yes. We even drove 23 miles to see a big stupid blue whale. A fake one, not a real one if you are confused. Ha Ha Ha. Just so you know if you ever drive on Route 66, it's very scenic, a little lame and it literally dead ends in the middle of nowhere. Literally nowhere. We had to get off it a little before it just ended at a gas station and figure out what road to then take to keep um driving west. Kinda funny really. Route 66 just dead ends.
So. We found some road to drive on to Texas...All my Ex's live in Texas, The size of TX deep inside,Amarillo by Mornin...do you know how many songs have Texas in them? alot, trust me. We drove thru Amarillo. You'd think the picture songs paint of Amarillo that it'd be cool. Amarillo was scary. It was One Huge Cheesy Hilly to da Billy Dump of a place. For real. Dump.
In case you are wondering, we haven't slept yet. We did stop to take a PTA at least once by now though, so we don't stink:) If you are unsure of what a PTA is, think long and hard about it, you'll figure it out.
Yeah, we found a really nice windmill with all it's paddles too. Looked like a picture out of an old west movie, really cool. Jenna was super excited. Jenna, do you see that? Yes. What is it? I don't know, let's go see. It's the Biggest Cross in the United States. We had to take picutures, of course, we knew Granny would have loved to see it.
We didn't actually STOP and sleep and stay in a hotel until Gallop, New Mexico. Why? Not sure. I think we were just having too much fun feeling the freedom of having no where to go.
We'd stop when we wanted to 'see' something or have to pee or eat (again) or fill up with more gas...little honda prelude was pretty good on gas thank goodness...it never felt cramped in that car either, which is weird, cuz it's small...felt cramped after the WHOLE TRIP was actually OVER, but that would be like 3weeks from now...anywho....it's only March 6th now and we're in New Mexico...
Gallup, New Mexico was so pretty. At night we saw all the little adobe Pueblo Indian Reservation 'homes' lit up on the side of the 'mountains'. Super cool. Jenna finally was driving when we hit New Mexico...she was so tired at one point, she yelled "Kendra I need your help, my eyeballs are like stuck!". We still laugh about this. We slept forever in that hotel too, finally got up to leave and we were eating pizza for 'breakfast' at 2:00pm. What is it about this trip that I crave pizza? ha ha ha I swear every time we needed food, we both wanted pizza. Some gas stations had the best pizza and Pizza Hut is everywhere. oh almost forgot my song...just so happens to be Tim...Albuquerque...waitin outta blizzard. We just drove through the ginormous city of Albuquerque in the middle of the night towards Gallup. It seemed to be a nice city if I remember right, but really all I remember was it was like HUGE and Glowing with lights. Before this trip, I didn't know how to spell Albuquerque either, now I do.
Anywho(I say anywho alot forgive me)I wanted to at least see ONE cactus, you know, like a perfect guy with a hat on cactus...not even one in all of the Painted Desert. Ok, I'm sure there's at least one, but not from where we could see from the road and any of our stops. New Mexico is FLAT. Pretty, but flat...with big rock figures out in the distance. Don't wanna call them mountains, cuz they were way smaller than any mountains. I think it was about this point in our trip that we said, ok we can't just drive until we wanna die of sleep, we have to sleep AT NIGHT and drive during the DAY. Ha. I find it funny how we had to have an actual talk about this, like it never even crossed our minds before this...Arizona, here was come, after we sleep.
(...to be cont...)
Making up songs
I woke up to Maggie not really yelling, but not really just asking for DONKEY.
Donkey is a McDonald's toy Will gave her (because Maggie likes Shrek more than me...awww...is that not adorable). Donkey has a waffle in his mouth. She loves the darn thing. I wish Maggie was just a little older to take her to the THEATRE to see Shrek Forever After because she stinkin LOVES the Shrek movies. Loves Loves Loves Shrek, Donkey, Kitty and Fiona! Talks about them regularly even if the movies are not on. Maggie also really likes to make up songs and sings them. She will just randomly throw in one of their names, it's so funny. Usually she is singing sort of in jibberish but with like every 3rd word a real word. One day, we were out on the front 'poach' singing into the bamboo stick...not safe, I know, shut up...anywho, she is singing...oh wee daddy me and mommy and daddy car lights shrek alklalllah lah lah loo loo weeeeeeeeeee eeeeee eeeeeee mommy eeee auntgin will em fiona ahhhh ewwwwwww...it cracks me up. When she gets to singing and dancing, it's so funny, I pretty much stop whatever it is I'm doing to be her audience. I think she likes that part too. I would say she sings and dances and makes up songs like every other day. She is the smartest kid alive, I know. :)
Donkey is a McDonald's toy Will gave her (because Maggie likes Shrek more than me...awww...is that not adorable). Donkey has a waffle in his mouth. She loves the darn thing. I wish Maggie was just a little older to take her to the THEATRE to see Shrek Forever After because she stinkin LOVES the Shrek movies. Loves Loves Loves Shrek, Donkey, Kitty and Fiona! Talks about them regularly even if the movies are not on. Maggie also really likes to make up songs and sings them. She will just randomly throw in one of their names, it's so funny. Usually she is singing sort of in jibberish but with like every 3rd word a real word. One day, we were out on the front 'poach' singing into the bamboo stick...not safe, I know, shut up...anywho, she is singing...oh wee daddy me and mommy and daddy car lights shrek alklalllah lah lah loo loo weeeeeeeeeee eeeeee eeeeeee mommy eeee auntgin will em fiona ahhhh ewwwwwww...it cracks me up. When she gets to singing and dancing, it's so funny, I pretty much stop whatever it is I'm doing to be her audience. I think she likes that part too. I would say she sings and dances and makes up songs like every other day. She is the smartest kid alive, I know. :)
Saturday, May 22, 2010
f&%ckin Barney
Ok so this is the first time I let Maggie pick out a dvd at the library on her own and possibly the last. There's like 100,000 dvds to pick from right...follow along here...there are all sorts of colors and characters...characters she's familiar with and characters she's not...what on earth made her stoop down and zero in on Barney. We've never watched Barney on tv, we've never talked about a big creepy purple dinosaur, we don't own any Barney dvds or vhs tapes or 8 tracks, we don't put in Barney cds in the car...why would she zero in on him out of all the other ones? There are pink princessy looking ones and Diego and Dora and Big Bird and Elmo...all ones I would have thought she'd be jumping for joy over, but no, she wants Barney. She says 'puhpull one mama'! Like I can say no to that. We check it out. Along with an elmo one I grabbed just in case Barney would disappoint. Did he dissappoint? um, no. She was jumping up and down excited and trying to sing and dance along with the big grape. What the?? Why? I really really really don't like Barney. He's kinda a creepy pedophile like sounding moron. agggghhhhh. So we've officially watched 'BawKnee' 37 times. She was very upset when it was time for bed the first night and we had to turn off above said moron. She was in her crib pouting for 'BawKnee'! Oh god. I being the wonderful fulfill her every happiness mother won't deny her Barney, but why Barney? Elmo rocks compared to Barney, even though his voice, thank you Kevin Clash, gets a little irritating sometimes. But at least his voice doesn't make my skin crawl like I wanna check out the i'm a creepy purple dinosexoffender website!! aggh...ok I'm being a little dramatic, but I don't like Barney. I took the 1st Barney back and got The Doddlebops,The Best of Barney(he's been around like 20 yrs..what?)The Lion King and Monsters Inc....do you think we've been able to throw in anything other than the BEST OF Barney? Negatory. Seriously, Maggie, you are lucky you are so damn cute!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
I love Parenthood
I'm not exactly(this time)talking about Maggie here, even though nothing tops being Maggie's Mommy...
I'm talking about after Maggie goes to sleep from 10:00pm-11:00pm on Tuesday nights after Glee is over. I'm talking Mommy time that keeps me as sane as is possible for being me. I'm talking watching a tv show without interruption(usually)...
I watch Parenthood. I love pretty much everything about it so far. The characters are awesome and the issues are real...i love love love it. If I were a wine drinker, I'd pour me a glass and snuggle up by myself on the couch for this one! Since I'm not, I fill my water glass up again and flop down exhausted and enjoy. I have to admit, it's not exactly terrible that at least a couple of the MEN on the show are yummy too.
Tune in.
I'm talking about after Maggie goes to sleep from 10:00pm-11:00pm on Tuesday nights after Glee is over. I'm talking Mommy time that keeps me as sane as is possible for being me. I'm talking watching a tv show without interruption(usually)...
I watch Parenthood. I love pretty much everything about it so far. The characters are awesome and the issues are real...i love love love it. If I were a wine drinker, I'd pour me a glass and snuggle up by myself on the couch for this one! Since I'm not, I fill my water glass up again and flop down exhausted and enjoy. I have to admit, it's not exactly terrible that at least a couple of the MEN on the show are yummy too.
Tune in.
Monday, May 17, 2010
pain
pain makes me irritable.
pain makes me sad.
pain makes me irritable, wait did I already say that?
I'm icing my back now and my legs are numb, I should probably get up now and change positions because if I don't I'll be even more 'stiffer'.
I get so sick of thinking about, feeling and talking about my bad back. I'm just tired of it. Percocet and chiropractic care seems to help, but yesterday I went for a walk, about 2 miles, not too fast, not too slow, "ran" across two intersections...we use the word ran loosely here ok...I came home, felt good, stretched outside for awhile, then came in the stretch my back...nothing ever hurt UNTIL I wanted to get up off the floor...I couldn't. It took me about 20 minutes to move from the floor to a sitting position on the couch, moto moto hooked me up with the ice pack and I downed a percocet like nobody's business...made my way eventually to my bad to lay down and take some pressure off. Thank God, I think that is the only reason, other than my percs, that I can move today. Moto Moto was off work last night so he was major ON-DUTY, so I didn't have to do anything other than rest, ice, change position...repeat. Ugh. Back pain really effects the whole body, including my mind. Enough of this already. I'm better, not good. Did the dishes and needed to 'rest'. Got dressed and needed to 'rest'. Did my makeup and needed to 'rest'. Woke up the boy to watch the girl so I could drive myself to the chiropractor...I was scared cuz I knew it would hurt but be a good hurt. I cried to him. I cried during the adjustment and I cried to myself in the car afterwards. I'm just so over this.
Anywho, before the chiropractor, I dropped a book off at the library and ended up buying 3 books for $2 and rented two movies for Maggie and I tonight...more couch time the better...if she's in a movie trance, I can do less moving with my back...so Alvin, Simon, Theodore and your squeakual...well, you'd better be kick ass or I'll or I'll...well I don't know, I'll kick you when I can lift my own leg!!
pain makes me sad.
pain makes me irritable, wait did I already say that?
I'm icing my back now and my legs are numb, I should probably get up now and change positions because if I don't I'll be even more 'stiffer'.
I get so sick of thinking about, feeling and talking about my bad back. I'm just tired of it. Percocet and chiropractic care seems to help, but yesterday I went for a walk, about 2 miles, not too fast, not too slow, "ran" across two intersections...we use the word ran loosely here ok...I came home, felt good, stretched outside for awhile, then came in the stretch my back...nothing ever hurt UNTIL I wanted to get up off the floor...I couldn't. It took me about 20 minutes to move from the floor to a sitting position on the couch, moto moto hooked me up with the ice pack and I downed a percocet like nobody's business...made my way eventually to my bad to lay down and take some pressure off. Thank God, I think that is the only reason, other than my percs, that I can move today. Moto Moto was off work last night so he was major ON-DUTY, so I didn't have to do anything other than rest, ice, change position...repeat. Ugh. Back pain really effects the whole body, including my mind. Enough of this already. I'm better, not good. Did the dishes and needed to 'rest'. Got dressed and needed to 'rest'. Did my makeup and needed to 'rest'. Woke up the boy to watch the girl so I could drive myself to the chiropractor...I was scared cuz I knew it would hurt but be a good hurt. I cried to him. I cried during the adjustment and I cried to myself in the car afterwards. I'm just so over this.
Anywho, before the chiropractor, I dropped a book off at the library and ended up buying 3 books for $2 and rented two movies for Maggie and I tonight...more couch time the better...if she's in a movie trance, I can do less moving with my back...so Alvin, Simon, Theodore and your squeakual...well, you'd better be kick ass or I'll or I'll...well I don't know, I'll kick you when I can lift my own leg!!
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Doggy Did It
Maggie pooped on her potty last night. She was 'helping' me clean up the kitchen and said 'potty'. Wait, let me back up, she has said this before and nothing comes of it, she's already gone potty in her diaper or I put her on the potty and she's scared or sits there and acts distracted like what the hell am I supposed to do on here Mommy? This time she said it like um, mom, um, potty, now. She even walked to the kitchen door towards the bathroom. I asked 'you have to go potty baby?' She said 'mmmmhmmm' (yes nod yes nod). So I took her in there, took off her pants and diaper and she wanted her shirt off too for some reason and said 'nakey'. I'm not fighting this, I just go with it. So here she is nakey sitting on her potty, not doing anything, talking to me, looking around, pointing at the stuff in the bathtub...she's getting up every few seconds and I'm saying 'no no honey, sit back down and potty'. She'd sit back down and we'd start the game all over. Daddy by this time has made it upstairs ready for work, so we're all having a potty party. I'm convinced, she won't go. Then, she barely squats to sit and poops in the potty, scares herself, jumps for me, and says 'skeered skeered' and is holding on to me...I am shocked myself and am reaching for the wipes...then she looks over at the potty and says 'doggy did it'. WHAT? Where on earth did she get that? Wait, she has been obsessed with Marly and Me lately watching the Doggy parts...so maybe that's the only poop she's actually seen??? John Grogan is hosing down doggy poo in their backyard looking for Jenny's necklace that Marley had eaten...hmmmm...maybe this does make complete sense, at least in Maggie's little head it did. Either way, she went poop on the BIG Girl Potty!
Now today, not so much. I thought, ok, force it a little more...so before I got her dressed, I asked her if she needed to go potty, she said k...I put her on the potty and nothing...she fighting it, I say ok, we'll get dressed now, just tell Mommy when you have to go potty and we'll come back...she walks into her bedroom with her shopping cart and pees on the floor. LOL. Wait, Marley did that too! :)
Now today, not so much. I thought, ok, force it a little more...so before I got her dressed, I asked her if she needed to go potty, she said k...I put her on the potty and nothing...she fighting it, I say ok, we'll get dressed now, just tell Mommy when you have to go potty and we'll come back...she walks into her bedroom with her shopping cart and pees on the floor. LOL. Wait, Marley did that too! :)
Sunday, May 9, 2010
food is evil
I think I have done good on my new eating...'diet'...what I can follow the rest of my life, but the scale sure isn't making me happy. I do FEEL better though...but I want to be dropping some poundage dangit. I think I've had more raw vegetables and salads the past 3 weeks than I have in my whole life...I've 'cheated' some...a BK breakfast sandwich(no hashbrowns like I'd normally HORK down), 5 chicken nuggets and some fries(not large sized or a 10 pack like I'd normally HORK down), and Mom's night out was at Wings, so I had wings. But other than that, really honestly I've cut my portions down big time from what I'd normally HORK down. Ok, enough of the word HORK...if that is even a word...Raw vegetables and fruits keep me full, which is good. Salads and a glass of water before dinner make me eat less of the dinner...if I get hungry, I eat vegetables and hummus or some almonds...BEFORE I'd HORK down, oops, I used HORK again again again...Before, I'd have slammed back some chips any kind but usually doritoes and thought nothing of it...so exercise must be where I'm lacking, other than going outside with Maggie and walking, I don't do much because of how my back feels most days, so next Monday...maybe the Monday after because I'm a taxi service this week with alot going on...I'm going to start, even if I can do 7 minutes, p90x. I will avoid anything that aggrevates my back, but I can fast forward thru those. Something is better than nothing. Instead of sitting on my doopah while Maggie naps on the computer, I'm going to change into my work out gear and do SOMETHING physical while she is napping...Moto Moto did his 1st 6 days of p90x and of course I wanna punch him because he seems to have the motivation and focus I'm lacking right now, plus a 5 lb weight loss. Boys suck, Ha Ha Ha. I can't complain though because Moto Moto is on board with anything I'm cooking. He is just trying whatever it is and not having seconds and not complaining. Most men would be like where are my meat and taters, but he's doing really good. Which should make this NEW life style easier, but I'm,for some reason, still struggling...maybe I should chuck my scale out the window, wait none of our windows open to chuck the scale out of...ok maybe I'll put it under my tire when I'm backing out of the drive way and crush it??? Either way, I don't like what it says to me...everything I've ever read, says make a few changes and wow look at the results, apparently, they aren't talking to me. I feel like I've changed ALOT and I've lost 3 whoopteedo lbs. Anywho, off to chew on some celery, have a lovely day why don't ya :)
Friday, May 7, 2010
Princess ToughinCakes
Maggie...she really cannot be defined. She is so sassy and her own being. She isn't me, she isn't Aj, she is ONE person all her own...sure she has qualities of ours, but really, I look at her and think you are such a cool person. She is a mix of girly cuteness with a sprinkle of toughness that's just about right. She can hold her own. She knows what she wants and how quickly she'll get it. The Sassy Stink in her is hilarious most times to me unless directed right at me with disgust in something I should not be telling her NOT to do or to do. Hello, I should know she'll do it when she's gosh darn good and ready.
She has lately been a little multitasker when carrying things, she will tuck at least two things under her arm and fill both hands up...used to be one thing at a time, back and forth back and forth...It could be moving the UN-LIT(unlike her aunt)candles from the holders to the table across the porch or her 'food' from her shopping cart to the table to have pretend cuisine...no more than a couple trips now, she's a busy lady and has an agenda to keep. I love this. It's funny to watch.
Today, I'm leaving to pick up the Fireman Rain Coat wearing nephew from school and Maggie says "I go too mhhhmmm"...I had every intention of taking her with me, but she tells me what she's doing and what black pat-n-leather fancy princess shoes she is going to wear while we do it! We picked Will up, go to the bad bad bad for you golden arches quick food for lunch place, go to my sister's for the kids to chow down their chicken nuggies and get their toy out of the happiest meal ever bag...anywho, midgit sees AntGin painting her nails after lunch and she says "fing-goes antgin, pretty!". Miss Thing needs a manicure apparently:) So, I painted hers, she is so cute, she really thinks it's pretty. She grabs my hand and says "mommy pretty", now I guess I need a manicure. While our nails are drying, she holds her hands out like a WOMAN to dry and says "don't touch". So, they are dry enough by her standards and she's on to the next thing...seriously chucking crayons all over the living room with Will. I mean chucking them! Ha. So wahlah, today we have Princess ToughinCakes!
She has lately been a little multitasker when carrying things, she will tuck at least two things under her arm and fill both hands up...used to be one thing at a time, back and forth back and forth...It could be moving the UN-LIT(unlike her aunt)candles from the holders to the table across the porch or her 'food' from her shopping cart to the table to have pretend cuisine...no more than a couple trips now, she's a busy lady and has an agenda to keep. I love this. It's funny to watch.
Today, I'm leaving to pick up the Fireman Rain Coat wearing nephew from school and Maggie says "I go too mhhhmmm"...I had every intention of taking her with me, but she tells me what she's doing and what black pat-n-leather fancy princess shoes she is going to wear while we do it! We picked Will up, go to the bad bad bad for you golden arches quick food for lunch place, go to my sister's for the kids to chow down their chicken nuggies and get their toy out of the happiest meal ever bag...anywho, midgit sees AntGin painting her nails after lunch and she says "fing-goes antgin, pretty!". Miss Thing needs a manicure apparently:) So, I painted hers, she is so cute, she really thinks it's pretty. She grabs my hand and says "mommy pretty", now I guess I need a manicure. While our nails are drying, she holds her hands out like a WOMAN to dry and says "don't touch". So, they are dry enough by her standards and she's on to the next thing...seriously chucking crayons all over the living room with Will. I mean chucking them! Ha. So wahlah, today we have Princess ToughinCakes!
Thursday, May 6, 2010
4 colleges NO degree
I was reading another blog about a college professor, which switched my brain into, you are a loser Kendra, you went to 4 schools with nothing to show for it, not even the loan bill anymore cuz you paid it off(not that I'm really complaining about that one, thank you god that is over really). I went to Butler right out of high school, for one semester. I didn't really like it there. I had a boyfriend at home and my parents were in the process of 'splitting'...so every weekend, sometimes thursday night, I'd skip my one or two friday classes and I'd drive the 3 hours home. It take me long to figure out I'd finish out the semester and come home for good. Only thing I liked was my German professor who looked like Santa Claus, the cute boy in that class that brought me a sucker and asked me out, the 1st Frat party I'd ever been to, McDonald's run for LARGE diet cokes with Sara for Monopoly pieces, coloring for stress relief while my roommate and her boyfriend studied WAY harder and MORE than I did for tests, worked late afternoons at an Ad Agency in their basement doing data entry and mail where they specifically pointed out that the extra fridge was for after hours beers(should have stayed there hello), the pretty drive when I got close to school with all the rich people's houses, the ghetto street behind campus and Broad Ripple.
My 2nd school was Purdue North Central, LOVED it there. Close to home, made a nice friend to meet up with for lunch and to study with, good professors (except one nazi, more on that in uno momento), nice little campus, the drive to and from school from New Carlisle was relaxing, classes Monday thru Thursday...History Professor Nazi was well a friggin jerk face. He was known for 'failing' people, calling on people when he thought they DIDN'T know the answer, putting in a movie and leaving the classroom, 'locking' the door if you're late etc...well I hated him, he made me so angry and there was nothing I could do about it except GO to CLASS and ACT like I knew everything, read and re-read chapters before class, take good notes...well, no matter what, he'd call on me when I didn't have a clue and make me feel stupid...then we had a blizzard, a lake effect Indiana blizzard...I spun off the road on the way to school, knew I'd be late for his class but still decided I'd go because it would be pretty obvious to HIM that there was indeed a blizzard outside and my 'excuse' would fly...it didn't fly...I came in and sat down and he was like SO NICE OF YOU TO JOIN US...did I mention I was only like 6 minutes late considering my toyata tercel hatch back had slid off the road and I drive from New Carlisle hello...I said I'M SO SORRY, I FLEW OFF THE ROAD AND IT TOOK ME DOUBLE THE TIME TO GET HERE BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO MISS YOUR CLASS(threw that last part in there for kicks)...he pretty much gave me shit for 10 minutes about how I should have accounted for the weather (which I thought I did) and how it's not responsible to have his class held up on my account BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. Jerk. I got a C in his class, dammit, but I passed and I never had to see him ever again!!
My speech professor was a a lawyer and was so cool. My Sociology professor was like a groovy mad scientist that made me want to change my degree, he made everything so interesting. The neGAHtive NOOMbers Astronomy teacher I learned to love after I could understand him.
IUSB was my 3rd school, I pretty much didn't like it, not the school, but the situations(a stupid boy)in my life, I saw school as a pain...bad attitude on my part...I went but didn't enjoy it like I should have been...decided I was bored with Elementary Education classes and decided I wanted to do Speech Pathology and for that degree I'd have to trasfer to a different school...I believe if I remember correctly I took some time off, worked and prepared for leaving..seriously breaking ties with aforementioned stupid boy...anywho...
Ended up at Purdue...Purdue really is a great nice beautiful school. I felt too old to be in dorms and too broke to be in an apartment, so I chose to live in a Grad House. I had a single room, thank god, because once I lived there for a day, I realized the whole damn place was full of stinky foreigners. I have nothing against them, just the smell of the food they eat. Oh my, I stuffed towels under my door to help block the stinky rotten dirt smell of the food, which even if they weren't cooking, lingered. So many good and bad things happened while I was there. I liked my classes, felt really challenged by them, liked having my focus on speech pathology. I took sign language and never thought it would be so hard not to talk and to get my hands to move, boy was I wrong, it was so hard. My professor for my hearing classes was so hard on us and seemed to test so hard, I'd feel sick before my tests....I don't test well under normal circumstances, but she made it even worse...but I LEARNED so much from her. Jenna would come to see me ALL THE TIME, stayed in my room with me, we had so much fun...like a glove drunken nights...parties...it was just fun. Decided she was going to move down, we moved to my uncle's house to save money then to a kick ass apartment...little by little money got tighter and tighter and bills were getting the best of me, jobs sucked, too much time to work and for not enough money, first waitressing job was at Texas Roadhouse, hated every minute of that, worked for a call center(I don't know how people make it in call centers)...work was more important than school to keep up with my bills...I took a summer job at my first and last factory, left at the 1st bell for break because I was literally bloody and scared as hell...I think Jenna and I went to a movie that night instead. Ha. Found another job as a night auditor for a hotel, it was an alright job, my boss was super nice, but the job itself was soooooo boring...I'm not sure how it happened, but we decided to move home. I was going to TAKE A BREAK from school and pay off my bills and then go back to PNC or IUSB...
Well peeps, as you all know now, THAT didn't happen. LOL. I worked and drank alot, worked some more, met AJ, got married, had Maggie...and now I'm the happiest I've ever been doing the hardest job I've ever done!!!
My 2nd school was Purdue North Central, LOVED it there. Close to home, made a nice friend to meet up with for lunch and to study with, good professors (except one nazi, more on that in uno momento), nice little campus, the drive to and from school from New Carlisle was relaxing, classes Monday thru Thursday...History Professor Nazi was well a friggin jerk face. He was known for 'failing' people, calling on people when he thought they DIDN'T know the answer, putting in a movie and leaving the classroom, 'locking' the door if you're late etc...well I hated him, he made me so angry and there was nothing I could do about it except GO to CLASS and ACT like I knew everything, read and re-read chapters before class, take good notes...well, no matter what, he'd call on me when I didn't have a clue and make me feel stupid...then we had a blizzard, a lake effect Indiana blizzard...I spun off the road on the way to school, knew I'd be late for his class but still decided I'd go because it would be pretty obvious to HIM that there was indeed a blizzard outside and my 'excuse' would fly...it didn't fly...I came in and sat down and he was like SO NICE OF YOU TO JOIN US...did I mention I was only like 6 minutes late considering my toyata tercel hatch back had slid off the road and I drive from New Carlisle hello...I said I'M SO SORRY, I FLEW OFF THE ROAD AND IT TOOK ME DOUBLE THE TIME TO GET HERE BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO MISS YOUR CLASS(threw that last part in there for kicks)...he pretty much gave me shit for 10 minutes about how I should have accounted for the weather (which I thought I did) and how it's not responsible to have his class held up on my account BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. Jerk. I got a C in his class, dammit, but I passed and I never had to see him ever again!!
My speech professor was a a lawyer and was so cool. My Sociology professor was like a groovy mad scientist that made me want to change my degree, he made everything so interesting. The neGAHtive NOOMbers Astronomy teacher I learned to love after I could understand him.
IUSB was my 3rd school, I pretty much didn't like it, not the school, but the situations(a stupid boy)in my life, I saw school as a pain...bad attitude on my part...I went but didn't enjoy it like I should have been...decided I was bored with Elementary Education classes and decided I wanted to do Speech Pathology and for that degree I'd have to trasfer to a different school...I believe if I remember correctly I took some time off, worked and prepared for leaving..seriously breaking ties with aforementioned stupid boy...anywho...
Ended up at Purdue...Purdue really is a great nice beautiful school. I felt too old to be in dorms and too broke to be in an apartment, so I chose to live in a Grad House. I had a single room, thank god, because once I lived there for a day, I realized the whole damn place was full of stinky foreigners. I have nothing against them, just the smell of the food they eat. Oh my, I stuffed towels under my door to help block the stinky rotten dirt smell of the food, which even if they weren't cooking, lingered. So many good and bad things happened while I was there. I liked my classes, felt really challenged by them, liked having my focus on speech pathology. I took sign language and never thought it would be so hard not to talk and to get my hands to move, boy was I wrong, it was so hard. My professor for my hearing classes was so hard on us and seemed to test so hard, I'd feel sick before my tests....I don't test well under normal circumstances, but she made it even worse...but I LEARNED so much from her. Jenna would come to see me ALL THE TIME, stayed in my room with me, we had so much fun...like a glove drunken nights...parties...it was just fun. Decided she was going to move down, we moved to my uncle's house to save money then to a kick ass apartment...little by little money got tighter and tighter and bills were getting the best of me, jobs sucked, too much time to work and for not enough money, first waitressing job was at Texas Roadhouse, hated every minute of that, worked for a call center(I don't know how people make it in call centers)...work was more important than school to keep up with my bills...I took a summer job at my first and last factory, left at the 1st bell for break because I was literally bloody and scared as hell...I think Jenna and I went to a movie that night instead. Ha. Found another job as a night auditor for a hotel, it was an alright job, my boss was super nice, but the job itself was soooooo boring...I'm not sure how it happened, but we decided to move home. I was going to TAKE A BREAK from school and pay off my bills and then go back to PNC or IUSB...
Well peeps, as you all know now, THAT didn't happen. LOL. I worked and drank alot, worked some more, met AJ, got married, had Maggie...and now I'm the happiest I've ever been doing the hardest job I've ever done!!!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
my vote
Here's what gets my vote today:
1. Republican ticket
2. Randy Peppers for sheriff
3. Maggie out in the sunshine
4. Maggie driBing her 'car' out in the sunshine
5. Will wearing alot of orange
6. Em going to school even though she doesn't want to RUN today
7. sunshine and a nice breeze so it's not too hot
8. sunroof open and music up a little louder than normal
9. Will singing 'STRUT STRUT'
10.Maggie laughing at Will singing 'STRUT STRUT'
11.Broccoli slaw
12.Diet Coke
Here's what doesn't get my vote today:
1. Having to choose republican or democrat ticket, I just wanted Randy to get my vote and he happens to be on the republican ticket. I don't want to be in a category.
2. wet grass even though the sun is shining
3. not looking forward to blinking and Maggie really driBing.
4. Em being GRADED on running
5. summer coming with a vengence and it'll be so HUMID
6. Will knowing what STRUT means ha ha
7. Maggie having any self conscience moments and not just laughing at what she thinks is funny.
8. McDonald's only taking cash this morning for whatever reason, so I couldn't cheat on my eating healthy plan like I wanted to. BK didn't do the trick, DAMMIT.
9. no cold diet cokes in the fridge, I like it out of a can, not on ice. grrrr.
:)
1. Republican ticket
2. Randy Peppers for sheriff
3. Maggie out in the sunshine
4. Maggie driBing her 'car' out in the sunshine
5. Will wearing alot of orange
6. Em going to school even though she doesn't want to RUN today
7. sunshine and a nice breeze so it's not too hot
8. sunroof open and music up a little louder than normal
9. Will singing 'STRUT STRUT'
10.Maggie laughing at Will singing 'STRUT STRUT'
11.Broccoli slaw
12.Diet Coke
Here's what doesn't get my vote today:
1. Having to choose republican or democrat ticket, I just wanted Randy to get my vote and he happens to be on the republican ticket. I don't want to be in a category.
2. wet grass even though the sun is shining
3. not looking forward to blinking and Maggie really driBing.
4. Em being GRADED on running
5. summer coming with a vengence and it'll be so HUMID
6. Will knowing what STRUT means ha ha
7. Maggie having any self conscience moments and not just laughing at what she thinks is funny.
8. McDonald's only taking cash this morning for whatever reason, so I couldn't cheat on my eating healthy plan like I wanted to. BK didn't do the trick, DAMMIT.
9. no cold diet cokes in the fridge, I like it out of a can, not on ice. grrrr.
:)
Monday, May 3, 2010
LBS
When I see lbs, I cannot say pounds, I ALWAYS say "ullbbzz".
I also say a few other things 'wrong', which at some point or another I've been called out on and I find it funny...I didn't realize how I said it wasn't exactly right, I see in my head the word and it's correct to me.
Anyways, I say golf with no L "Goff"
I say Penguin with an I instead of an E "PINGguin"
I say chocolate with emphasis on an A sound that's not there "chaacklit".
Well maybe you say stuff that's wrong ish too...think about it.
I know someone who says panAcakes for pancakes, when clearly there is no extra A in there. Same person says ruin like ROON. I know someone who says onion like UNGyun. That is actually quite hard to pronounce it the way they say it, it's way back in the throaty sound...
See I'm not the only one, mine are endearing, yours are stupid. HA HA HA LOL
:)
I also say a few other things 'wrong', which at some point or another I've been called out on and I find it funny...I didn't realize how I said it wasn't exactly right, I see in my head the word and it's correct to me.
Anyways, I say golf with no L "Goff"
I say Penguin with an I instead of an E "PINGguin"
I say chocolate with emphasis on an A sound that's not there "chaacklit".
Well maybe you say stuff that's wrong ish too...think about it.
I know someone who says panAcakes for pancakes, when clearly there is no extra A in there. Same person says ruin like ROON. I know someone who says onion like UNGyun. That is actually quite hard to pronounce it the way they say it, it's way back in the throaty sound...
See I'm not the only one, mine are endearing, yours are stupid. HA HA HA LOL
:)
Saturday, May 1, 2010
this I know
I know I don't like having conversations with strangers or people I don't know all that well...or neighbors...am I mean? No, I just really don't care that much about your life. In the time I could have been just having quality relaxing outside time with Maggie...well the neighbor was walking by and made himself comfortable.
I learned all kinds of shit I could really care less about. His sister's 1st husband is dying, her two older kids are in the military but on leave because of him dying, her newest daughter with her 2nd husband didn't make it to the bathroom last friday and he had to clean up poop, she is under weight for her age, she just turned two and she already has a nephew, his hands are really dry because of lifting something or nother at work, his dogwood tree had pink blossoms one year but now they're white, he usually gets up at noon, his cousin had nose surgery...BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH!
What I got out of this? Nothing, except I was really grossed out by the larger than life vein on the top of his knee and I couldn't stop staring...oh sorry, hmm, what did you say? I can't peel my eyes from the alien snake trying to escape through your knee...ugh
I learned all kinds of shit I could really care less about. His sister's 1st husband is dying, her two older kids are in the military but on leave because of him dying, her newest daughter with her 2nd husband didn't make it to the bathroom last friday and he had to clean up poop, she is under weight for her age, she just turned two and she already has a nephew, his hands are really dry because of lifting something or nother at work, his dogwood tree had pink blossoms one year but now they're white, he usually gets up at noon, his cousin had nose surgery...BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH!
What I got out of this? Nothing, except I was really grossed out by the larger than life vein on the top of his knee and I couldn't stop staring...oh sorry, hmm, what did you say? I can't peel my eyes from the alien snake trying to escape through your knee...ugh
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